Tuesday, March 22, 2016

Ketchup Doritos Are the Flower without Flour

The mainstream media has covered up a lot of big news in their day. Let's be serious here.

Remember when Saddam's statue fell? The Iraqi people were all dancing like Baghdad was Studio 54 and what did we hear from our so-called "embedded" journalists?

Nothing but stories about roadside bombings or tales of systemic torture by our Brave Troops versus the enemy combatants.

We may have gotten Iraq sorted out but there's still a lot we have to do to make our country whole again. Some of it MAY involve electing a Billionaire named Trump (but that depends on how many Wall-Building companies one might invest in, on Wall Street) or maybe we should just focus on the small things like showing our loved ones we care for them.

What better way to show your estranged wife that you want to reconcile, and that Julio was but an aberration, than to send her a bouquet of Ketchup Doritos? They would soften the heart of a diamond if such a compressed piece of carbon could taste and possibly chew them for a period of time.

But no, our schmernalists from the Fourth Estate (or is it the Fifth Column?) chose to write a handful of articles about the Ketchup Doritos bouquet. Thanks for the lack of sunlight. Our little plant will grow in this dim space.

Ketchup Doritos are here for a limited time only. Let's change that before our Country gets changed by Them.